Oh joy to the little men all stacked away
For this day they'll go as I promise to spray,
all for Masturbation Day !
Rubbin' my flipper and cockin' my gun
shaking my hands with the guy with one arm.
I take out my skin flute, solely to play,
all for Masturbation Day !
I'm waxing the dolphin, I'm plucking the duck
I'm freeing the Willies, I practice for fuck
I'm hanging the hamster, I'm trowing my bait
It's the rise and the fall of Peter the Great
I toss and I skeet and I wank and I play,
It's all for Masturbation Day !
I'm just spewing crude here, with my bob blaster
I'm having a session alone with the master
Today is the day where the meeting begins
between Madame Palm, Big Jim and the twins
Pleasing the turtle, supply and demand,
beating the piss out of my little friend
If my girl comes beggin', I'll tell her: 'No Way'
Today, it's Masturbation Day !
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